InsaneJournal

Friday 1/2/08 AIM: Sydni and Fisher

s34sc4p3s: fisher?
hearitbleed: Last I checked
s34sc4p3s: its sydni
hearitbleed: Oh. Hey
s34sc4p3s: you talk to charlie's mom?
hearitbleed: Sometimes
hearitbleed: Talk to him, too
s34sc4p3s: next time you see her, could you tell her thanks for me
s34sc4p3s: i know. and i know that means you prolly dont want to talk much to me
hearitbleed: Truth be told, I rather like how you make Charlie so pissed all the time. I's good for him.
s34sc4p3s: uh...
s34sc4p3s: i dont. i dont think hell ever talk to me again
hearitbleed: Of course you don't think so. You told him shit he didn't want to hear. Sometimes he can be too retarded for his own good
s34sc4p3s: what i said was cruel and uncalled for. the majority of it
hearitbleed: What he does is cruel and uncalled for. He didn't give me details on what went on, but I guess I should just call you a bitch and then I've filled my friendship responsibilities
s34sc4p3s: lol
s34sc4p3s: thank you fisher
s34sc4p3s: how did you fare during the spell?
hearitbleed: Not so great. Very badly, actually
s34sc4p3s: oh no. are you ok now?
hearitbleed: Improving. Withdrawal sucks.
s34sc4p3s: o. be careful? i know withdrawal can be physically dangerous
hearitbleed: Opiod withdrawal won't kill me. Unfortunately. Though the worst is over
s34sc4p3s: o. im glad its over
s34sc4p3s: i mean the worst part
hearitbleed: Thanks.
hearitbleed: Are you alright?
s34sc4p3s: me? i didnt go through what you did
s34sc4p3s: i was just the worlds greatest bitch and may have lost a dear friend.
s34sc4p3s: im lucky i didnt lose my fiance
hearitbleed: I heard the lycans were all kinda crazy. He's probably thinking the same thing
s34sc4p3s: lol, he is a lycan. we were both crazy
s34sc4p3s: i broke two computers because of charlie. well, because of me. but i was talking to charlie
hearitbleed: You and Charlie sure do a lot of fighting
s34sc4p3s: we didnt used to. not till he left halcyon
hearitbleed: He said you never fought for him.
s34sc4p3s: o fuck him! im sorry, but that i cant agree with. he left with davia saying he couldnt imagine her like that, and then came back and he was with her
s34sc4p3s: so, excuse me for finding it too painful to play that game
hearitbleed: First of all, whoa calm down lady.
hearitbleed: Second... I don't know much about you two whatsoever. But I've always wondered if maybe the reason you guys fight so much is because you don't feed his insecurities
s34sc4p3s: sorry. it just angers me that hed say that.
s34sc4p3s: what do you mean?
hearitbleed: His raging ego is masked insecurity. That's basic psych 101. And if you didn't worship him like he likes, maybe that's why you never worked out.
s34sc4p3s: well, i wouldnt say i worshipped him, but i also dont believe hes the asshole he sometimes acts like
hearitbleed: Yeah, that makes him nuts when you say that.
s34sc4p3s: well, hes not
s34sc4p3s: and losing his memories proved that
s34sc4p3s: that is probably the one thing i said that was honest, and was not cruel
hearitbleed: If you lose your memories, you can be anything. It's all about circumstance. If he'd been feeding on Ava when he came to instead of fucking her, he'd assume he was a serial killer.
s34sc4p3s: i disagree
s34sc4p3s: he could have thought she was a prostitute and he was having some sort of black out from a bender
s34sc4p3s: he assumed they were in loved
s34sc4p3s: *love
hearitbleed: Well yeah, because there was women's shit in there. If it had just been his crap, he might have.
s34sc4p3s: um, charlies the perfect example of men not being faithful. i dont think your argument is completely solid
hearitbleed: But he didn't know he was a perfect example of not being faithful.
s34sc4p3s: he chose to believe himself a good person, and create a world in which he was a good person
s34sc4p3s: no, he didnt. but that didnt mean he couldnt think that his gf was moving out or moving in and this was his break for freedom either way. or any number of things
hearitbleed: I think you're being retardedly optimistic. And an asshole hates nothing more than being told what a good person he could be. Which you did to him all the time.
s34sc4p3s: only because its true
hearitbleed: How do you know? You see in him what you want to. All evidence proves the contrary
s34sc4p3s: and i dont think im being overly optimistic. when he lost his memory, he was a clean slate. he could have been anything. and he chose a good life
hearitbleed: No, he was handed a good life
s34sc4p3s: i cant even explain it properly. he wants to do good things. he just fucks up a lot.
s34sc4p3s: i dont think so
hearitbleed: Which doesn't make him a good person.
s34sc4p3s: hes honrable. old school honorable.
s34sc4p3s: fisher, you wont convince me otherwise
hearitbleed: Sydni, you're an idiot.
s34sc4p3s: if he didnt care what he did, then he wouldnt be a good person
s34sc4p3s: but he does. he thinks hes a lost cause which is why he keeps screwing up
hearitbleed: And he keeps doing stupid things despite him knowing they are bad. Which makes him...
s34sc4p3s: thanks.
s34sc4p3s: idiotic
hearitbleed: Well you are! fuck, no wonder you make him nuts
hearitbleed: You are so convinced that you are right about him when he would know a hell of a lot better than you would what kind of guy he is. I like him, I really do, but the guy is a prick. He treated you like shit, he chose Davia and he treated her like shit, and I am just waiting for the day he tells me "Ava is pissed" because he's treated HER like shit.
hearitbleed: Maybe he could be a good guy. But right now, he isn't.
s34sc4p3s: he didnt treat me like shit
s34sc4p3s: thats the point! he could be! he doesnt believe he could. and thats the problem
hearitbleed: You're the one who said he left with Davia saying it wasn't gonna happen and came back with her.
hearitbleed: That's shit.
s34sc4p3s: it is shit. things happen and i get that. i just get pissed when he says *i* was the one who abandonned him
hearitbleed: Why do you keep defending him? I mean really... that's the biggest thing, that you keep stupidly believing in him after all the fuck ups he's done
s34sc4p3s: but that was one thing, a big thing, granted, out of all the time we were... whatever we were.
s34sc4p3s: ill always believe in him. there is very little he could do to make me stop. its like, if you have a friend whos always fucking up. maybe you wont lend them $500, but youll help them get an interview, etc. just because i wont hand him my heart, aside from the obvious reasons, doesnt mean i cant believe in him
hearitbleed: And maybe him knowing that, knowing he's going to keep disappointing you repeatedly and you'll still be there, is what he hates most. You can believe in him and all that... but shut up about it.
s34sc4p3s: doesnt much matter right now since hes not talking to me.
s34sc4p3s: but, really, i just wanted to thank morgan, if you could do that for me?
hearitbleed: Sure, if she comes around.
s34sc4p3s: thank you.
s34sc4p3s: and i dont know much about you, but im always around if you need me.
hearitbleed: No thanks. Nothing personal, but I'm a lot like Charlie and I don't think I could stand another person telling me how much they believe in me.
s34sc4p3s: lol. ok, well, then if you *do* need someone saying that
hearitbleed: My sponsor is Angelina. If I need cotton candy and rainbows, I'm covered.
hearitbleed: But thank you.
s34sc4p3s: yw
s34sc4p3s: ill ttyl fisher
hearitbleed: See ya